Do you ever feel like you are searching for something, but don’t know what it is that you are looking for? Maybe you feel like something is missing in your life and you are looking for whatever it might be to give you the feeling of satisfaction. You find yourself in a frame of mind that whatever you do, wherever you go, you are searching.
Let me tell you what’s missing — you are!
Whenever you are looking outside of yourself for fulfillment, it’s because you are not allowing your empowered self to step forward. You are not allowing yourself to be satisfied with who you are, what you are doing, how you are living. I’m not saying that you have to stay where you are, I’m suggesting you meet yourself where you are — suspending judgment and lavishing self-love — and decide what you want to come next.
What You Seek Is Not Outside of You, It’s Within
More than 15 years ago, I decided that I was going to spend a year on spiritual development. To begin, I decided to visit a shaman, healer, and interfaith minister Maryphyllis Horn. I remember thinking to myself that Maryphyllis would “see” in me what I could give to the world and what my next steps should be. In fact, I remember feeling disappointed — maybe even a little irritated — that she didn’t mention anything “special” about me. The problem was not with Maryphyllis; rather, it was with me. I kept waiting for someone else to discover the real me because I didn’t have the courage — or patience — to discover myself.
If you are searching, turn inward and find yourself first. Acknowledge all you are with gentleness as if praising a young child for reciting his or her alphabet for the first time. Allow yourself to dream big dreams that make you smile from ear to ear. Then ask what kind of life would give you the most joy. From that space of reflection, decide how you want to show up in the world. Once you know the answer to that question, it’s just a matter of focusing on the outcome, deciding on your best next step, and celebrating every step you take in that direction of your desire.
To accomplish this, you just need one ingredient. Courage.
It takes a Braveheart to follow her dreams.
Because we feel like we have to have everyone’s consensus to live our lives our way.
When friends or loved ones question what we are doing, if we are not grounded in our self-love and self-respect, we value other’s opinion over our own. We hesitate, lose focus, question our judgment, and get lost along the way.
It takes a Braveheart to value her intuitive urging over the words of others.
Three Tips to Ignite Your Braveheart
- Make sacred “YOU” time. Women often put everyone and everything before themselves. It’s important to honor yourself with special time that you set aside for yourself, even if it’s 20 minutes to soak in a hot bath.
- Acknowledge your contributions for yourself and others to hear. At a time when I had five sons in the house, I remember going through a period where I didn’t feel that any of them appreciated me. So I started acknowledging all my “mom greatness” for them. As an example, “Am I not an amazing mom for running up to the school to take your lunch when you ran out of the house without it?” What began to happen is that the boys would smile, and then say, “Yes, you are a great mom!” Over time, all I would have to do is raise my hand and ask, “What does this make me?” to hear them respond, “It makes you a great mom!” There is nothing self-serving by acknowledging your value add, especially when you don’t feel it’s being observed by those benefiting!
- Ask the toughest questions to your heart first. We have been conditioned to look outside of us for all the answers, especially the hard ones. But who we are meant to be in this lifetime was planted in our soul before we ever arrived here in the physical plane. Your inner wisdom will always guide you toward the path of your highest calling, your greatest joy, your most empowered response. All you have to do is turn inward and ask.
What to Expect from Living in Courage
Activating your Braveheart is a practice of self-trust. It requires the willingness to take chances that you may have been unwilling to take before. Activating your Braveheart means you may have to stand out from the crowd, to go against the grain. To think — gasp — your truth, your path may be vastly different from family and friends. And that’s okay. That’s what makes you, YOU!
While it may feel awkward at first, stepping into your courage will not only change how you feel about yourself, it will change how others see you. In time, the pushback you may have first experienced when you stepped into your Braveheart way of living will dissipate. Family and friends will not be able to ignore your increased self-assurance. They will appreciate your increased sense of happiness and joy. And if they don’t appreciate the happier you, then you have to make one of your bravest moves ever — decide how to distance yourself from them.
A Braveheart’s work starts within. Those who notice the difference and admire the change are keepers because they accept you for who you are. Those who don’t are not ready. Hold them in a space of love, but don’t let them sway you from your path.
What is a Braveheart step that you want to make in your life?